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It's Official!

I've long suspected it, but it now turns out that soccer is gay.

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Discussions - 8 Comments

That's awesome. I love the Onion. Americans love our games to be fast-paced, high-scoring affairs, neither of which describe soccer. I hate when fans lament America's disaffection with The Game by arguing that everyone else in the world likes it. Of course, now that it's out of the closet, soccer will now be the Left's sport du jour, so maybe it will finally catch on.

Speaking of timely soccer humor, I saw where there was a facebook group to stop soccer matches from interrrupting vuvuzela concerts.

I'm always surprised when NLT bloggers and readers indicate they're Onion readers (or even fans); for every Onion piece that takes a gentle poke at liberals or liberal hipsters they have at least five that skewers the right. Oh no, liberal bias!!

Consider their political candidate-cum-news commentator Joad Cressbeckler. He's like some sort of cross between Sarah Palin (in his career path), Glenn Beck, Jed Clampett, and congressional candidate Christopher Weber of NJ (the guy who Steven Hayward offered his support in a couple of blog-posts), who previously had a YouTube vid where he waved a gun and sword into the web-cam while warning of Obama's healthcare "army."

Ladies and Gents, I give you Joad Cressbeckler:
http://www.theonion.com/video/semiliterate-former-gold-prospector-given-own-cabl,17408/


and then there's "Area Man Passionate Defender of What He Imagines Constitution to Be":
http://www.theonion.com/articles/area-man-passionate-defender-of-what-he-imagines-c,2849/

Yep, gotta love the Onion!

Craig, thanks for letting me know about Joad Cressbeckler! I nearly fell out of my chair! Seriously, it's one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. I'm not sure what it means that I enjoyed it, though. Maybe I don't take myself or my political views so seriously that I can't appreciate the humor in seeing them lampooned from time to time.

One of my best friends is an Ivy League educated lefty and he's the one who got me hooked on The Onion. I have no problem pointing out and mocking the peculiar proclivities of the Right and Left, I just tend to think the crazy guy who doesn't want you to take away his .50 cal SASR is less harmful to the country than the crazy guy who doesn't want you to use fossil fuels. That The Onion tends to focus on the Right simply reflects larger numbers of left-leaning individuals involved in the entertainment and media industries. That people on the Right still like them reflects that they're not idealogues.

John, I'm genuinely glad that you enjoyed the Joad. Did you see his other Onion appearance (he's actually gone from political candidate to news analyst, thus my Palin comparison)??

http://www.theonion.com/video/old-grizzled-thirdparty-candidate-may-steal-suppor,14264/

I think it might be even better than the new one.

That was a subtle bit of self-aggrandizement there in your explanation of how you could appreciate such a blistering satire of conservative tea-partiers, but really, look at the institutions that you're a part of. I dare say that No Left Turns and Ashbrook take themselves QUITE seriously and don't seem altogether keen on self-deprecating humor. I guess you dare to be different on that score. More power to you.

So... why not invite Stephen Colbert, or Lewis Black (see his vid on Glenn Beck having Nazi Tourette's Syndrome), or hey, Joad Cressbeckler to speak to the Ashbrook scholars? Or maybe as some opening acts at the next Ashbrook Memorial Dinner?

Andrew, you said you "just tend to think the crazy guy who doesn't want you to take away his .50 cal SASR is less harmful to the country than the crazy guy who doesn't want you to use fossil fuels."

Taking issue with the country's lack of restraint in using fossil fuels is not the same thing as not wanting "you" to use them altogether and completely, period. Also, by that standard (ignoring your "crazy" descriptor), I guess Stewart's vid medley of presidential addresses on the energy issue would indicate that every POTUS since, at least, Nixon has been "harmful" in their acknowledgment (via lip service) for actually getting "beyond petroleum."

Perhaps you could have picked a better example than a crazy guy with a ".50 caliber SASR" I have mixed feelings on the gun issue, so I try to avoid smearing gun-rights advocates as people who will insist on having their own bazookas and tanks if they think they can get away with it. But you're not helping matters when you talk of a 50-caliber SASR as a trivial thing. If the next McVeigh on a mission happens to have one and targets a plane taking off or landing, I think the case for the right to bear one might be harder to make. As it stands, they're a terrorist's dream weapon come true:

http://www.50caliberterror.com/index2.html

"That The Onion tends to focus on the Right simply reflects larger numbers of left-leaning individuals involved in the entertainment and media industries. That people on the Right still like them reflects that they're not idealogues."

Oh no, not that one again! As far as I know, there are no rules stopping conservatives from making their own entertainment and media businesses (see FoxNews - Glenn Beck, like Rush, has, at times, insisted that he's merely an entertainer). They dominate talk radio, and certainly have a presence online (Powerline, Malkin - gag - etc.) Also, I don't get the first part of that equation. If you can explain The Onion's popularity by your assertion "larger numbers of left-leaning individuals involved in the entertainment and media industries," then what DOES explain FoxNews, or online, Powerline or TheCorner's popularity? Are you referring to the people who make TheOnion, or the people who consume it? In any case, I don't think you're making sense there.

"That people on the Right still like them reflects that they're not idealogues."

Ideologues - with two o's. Sorry, pet peeve of mine.

Or maybe, like the survey that found a lot of conservatives really think/thought (perhaps word's getting out now) that Stephen Colbert is a staunch conservative, they just don't get it? Time to break out the postmodern conservatism and the notion of the text that has meaning determined by the reader, not the author!

"Are you referring to the people who make TheOnion, or the people who consume it?" Both. I didn't realize my statements were so controversial (ie younger comedy writers living and working in NYC and LA tending to be more liberal than not). As to the SASR, we'll just go on pretending that my comments were intended to be taken literally and leave it at that.

Andrew, there's absolutely nothing that I'm aware of that's stopping any conservative from making a right-wing version of The Onion. I'm sure whatever they might produce would be a big hit among TownHall and NewsMax fans and everyone's cranky aunts and uncles and grandparents who have learned how to forward e-mails. Whether it would have a broader appeal than that I don't know. Most people with good blood circulation to their brain can see that the left is not primarily composed of dirty, stinky hippies anymore (that's making the sketchy assumption that it ever was).

So, if your .50-caliber guy wasn't to be taken literally, then I guess your "crazy guy who doesn't want you to use fossil fuels" wasn't either. Good.

So then, what ARE the "the peculiar proclivities of the Right and Left" that deserve to be mocked?

But right now, society is sucking up fossil fuels like they're going out of style (so anyone who MIGHT be saying "don't use ANY!" is clearly not having any impact whatsoever), and 50-caliber sniper rifles which CAN take down airplanes pretty effectively are legal and not at all difficult to be procured, and I've not heard a word from Obama or anyone in power that this is going to change. So, as usual, the right's cries of constant-victimization (or imminent victimization) are steaming piles of it.

Craig, I wasn't complaining about TheOnion leaning left. You're the one who brought up the fact, then I put in my two cents on why it may be that individuals such as Dr. Moser and myself like TheOnion. Concerning the SASR (boy, you're really caught up on that), I'll just go ahead and spell it out: those were not concrete examples, they were caricatures of a far-right loon and a far-left loon who would be targets for TheOnion's acerbic wit. The man on the far-right represents an individual who just wants to be left alone; the man on the left represents an individual who wants the rest of the country to change their lives to coincide with what he believes. Therefore, to me, the individual who is pushing his beliefs on others is more harmful than the hermit who wants to be left alone. Got nuance?

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