Courts
Sometimes a story hits so close to home that it's hard to write about it through the haze of bewilderment and dumbfounded rage. This is such a moment.
Probably inspired by the federal government's obesity campaign, a lawsuit has been filed against Nutella. The mother of a 4 year-old was apparently "shocked" to learn the ambrosial hazelnut delight was not health-food, but rather "the next best thing to a candy bar."
1. It isn't the "next best thing to a candy bar." It so far surpasses candy bars as to be humiliated by the comparison.
2. I'm holding a beautiful glass jar o' the creamy goodness at this moment. The back clearly reads: 2 tbsp. = 200 Calories. That's a daily intake of fat in 8 seconds of weakness! How utterly stupid do you have to be...?
3. It's chocolate! How utterly stupid...?
4. An entire continent just across the Atlantic practically raises their kids on the heavenly nectar - and they're half our size (often literally).
5. Speaking of Europe, the first ingredient here in America is sugar, whereas, interestingly, the first ingredient in Germany is cocoa. A reflection on our (4 year old's) tastes....
6. I'll bet anything to anyone that this woman is the personification of a prude...
7. ...who voted for Obama.
8. Somewhere, Michelle Obama is smiling.
9. In a sane world, the debate wouldn't be whether this mother can get money from Nutella for voluntarily feeding it to her kids, but rather whether she is obviously too deranged to raise kids.
10. She'll probably win.
I never thought I could miss posts from Knippenberg and Lawler so much, but I do.
This is beginning to feel more and more like e-mail updates from Beck, Limbaugh, or NewsMax.
First they come for the Nutella, and then your guns!
BTW, where are Knippenberg and Lawler??
Well they both post at First Thoughts, so you're more than welcome to head for the door...
Thanks for the tip, "Owl of Minerva" - is there a one-blog-at-a-time rule on the internets?
Well here is what the website says:
"A 2005 article summarizing the results of over 30 studies on breakfast consumption by children and adolescents and its relationship with nutritional adequacy and academic performance revealed, among other things, the following:1
•Kids who eat breakfast are more likely to meet their nutrient intake recommendations over the course of the day than their breakfast-skipping peers.
•Eating breakfast may positively benefit cognitive function related to memory, academic performance and school attendance.
•Skipping breakfast has been linked to increased snacking during the day or higher intake of high fat snacks.
While we all know that eating a balanced breakfast is important, having the time to feed our children a wholesome meal in the morning can be a challenge.
Connie Evers, M.S., R.D., a registered dietitian and children’s nutrition expert explains that “breakfast needs to be something families look forward to, rather than a stressful and challenging experience for moms and children.” She suggests waking up earlier to ensure the entire family has time to sit down and enjoy the meal together. Parents that set a good example and eat in the morning will help set the stage for their children to follow suit.
Evers continues to say that variety is the key when designing a breakfast that will supply energy to last throughout the morning. “Children need a balance of nutrients and tasty goodness, and moms need a breakfast solution that is quick and convenient,” states Evers.
Create a meal of whole wheat toast or a whole-grain toaster waffle with Nutella® hazelnut spread, a small bowl of sliced strawberries and a glass of 1% milk for a good mix of morning nutrients.
When used in moderation with complementary foods, Nutella® can form a part of a balanced meal. It is a quick and easy way to encourage kids to eat whole grains, such as whole wheat toast, English muffins, toaster waffles and bagels. With the unique taste of Nutella®, kids may think they are eating a treat for breakfast while moms are helping nourish their children with whole grains."
I think like all if she is going to sue Nutella she is going to have to prove that she rellied on what Nutella said.
Did she create a meal of whole wheat toast with nutella, some strawberries and a glass of 1% milk...
Or did she hand the kid a jar of nutella with a spoon?
It isn't stupid to relly on Nutella to help your kids get a decent breakfast.
The problem comes when you also put hersheys chocolate syrup in the 1% milk and add sugar, and cool whip to the strawberries.
Maybe even here this is healthier than no breakfast at all.
"When used in moderation with complementary foods, Nutella® can form a part of a balanced meal."
In order to show that she rellied on what she thinks is "puffery" on the part of Nutella, she should have to show that she followed the instructions included in said "puffery". That is she used the product in moderation with "complementary foods" (from the record, 1% milk, whole wheat grain breads, strawberries or some other fruit.)
If Nutella is capable of forming part of a balanced meal, it is capable only to the extent it is used in moderation and with complementary foods.
Nutella isn't Carlill v. Carbolic Smoke Ball, because Nutella actually works when used as intended.
She will probably lose on summary judgement or reach a small settlement.
Nah, they haven't got round to regulating it yet.
Just thought I'd help ya out, "Craig Scanlon."