Strengthening Constitutional Self-Government

No Left Turns

And Now. . . Ecosexuals?

We’ve had homosexuals, bisexuals, transsexuals, and metrosexuals, but are you ready for. . . ecosexuals?

The latest edition of San Francisco magazine has a feature article, "In Search of a Nice Gaia," in which ecosexuality is the theme. It includes such horselaugh-worthy gems as:

But one morning they went out for breakfast and Mr. Right ordered an all-meat meal and doused his coffee with several packets of Equal. "I was dumbstruck," says Pearson. "I think I ate my entire meal in silence. Pork plus Nutrasweet? That was definitely our last date." I’m guessing for the fellow the silence at that breakfast must have been golden.

There’s more great stuff like this. Another couple who couldn’t work out their conflicting greenery summed it up thus: "I shopped at Rainbow; she shopped at Safeway," is how Monte Gores, a 33-year-old stock-trader turned-acupuncturist summed up his differences with a woman he once dated. "One night she told me she’d just eaten half a chocolate cake for dinner," he says. Not exactly a "mindful" way to eat. "If you’re thinking about a long-term relationship, that’s a red flag." They broke up within two months.

This one quote gets it all in a single sentence: "It wasn’t just the compost," Claudia says, "but it raised some control issues that we couldn’t resolve." Glad that composting is something that you might be able to work through.

Unfortunately the article is not available online, or I’d say Read the Whole Thing. All I can say is, if Evelyn Waugh or P.G. Wodehouse were still alive, they’d have to collect unemployment to get by. Julie Ponzi, over to you.

Discussions - 19 Comments

Chapel Hill and Carrboro are inundated with "boutique" food markets. Overpriced cheeses and meats. The parking lots filled with Vovo’s, Saabs, BMW’s; almost all with Kerry/Edwards stickers still on them. While you will see an occasional older Chevy or pickup with gunrack sporting a Bush sticker. (Isn’t it supposed to be the other way around?)

I will at times shop at these places. But I go mainly to watch their regular customers.

Anyway I will prepare a dinner for my wife and I of macaroni with melted Velveetacheese and crumbled bacon; follwed by a can of Budweiser. If I feel sufficiently romantic a bottle of fine Duplin Carolina Red(a sweet local wine) to wash down the meal.

I have one of those girls in my freshman English class. She keeps ferrets and claims many things about mustelidae that I know are untrue. I just had a paper from her on the unnaturalness of wearing fur and animal skin, wherein she claimed that Nature is peaceful and offers a safe haven for all small creatures. She read that statement aloud in class, without blushing! I would place her in this category, ecosexual, firstly, because I would not doubt the implications of that term of her at all, considering what she says about her ferrets. Secondly, because her relationship with her live-in boyfriend seems to be all about their ferrets ("our babies") and animal rights activities. I am curious to see the boyfriend as I wonder what he might look like. You know, is he man or beast?

Steve, who was the author of the article?

Ecosexual? Don’t we have laws against such things?

To Kate (comment #2) I would speculate that the young lady’s boyfriend probably resembles a ferret.

Gad! Think of their offspring! But then do not worry. They may not have but one child or none at all. This may only be in keeping with Western Europe’s self-depopulation. I wonder what it would be like to have a Muslim nanny for their ONLYchild?

From the website "the smoking gun." Talk about ecosexual! NOVEMBER 16--Meet Bryan James Hathaway, alleged venison lover. The Wisconsin man, 20, is facing charges that he had sex last month with a dead deer. Hathaway, who previously has served time for killing a horse he intended to sexually assault, allegedly found the deer in a ditch alongside a roadway. Now Hathaway’s lawyer has filed a court motion (a copy of which you’ll find here) arguing that since the animal was already dead, Hathaway should not face a misdemeanor rap of sexual gratification with an animal. "The statute does not prohibit one from having sex with a carcass," lawyer Fredric Anderson wrote in the motion filed in Douglas County Circuit Court.

Jesse Fan,

I had the chance this week to meet the owner (Dave Fussell) of the Duplin Winery. He brought some of his grape with him and led us in this toast--perhaps it will be useful for you over that scrumptious meal you described:

Here’s to the land of the long leaf pine,
The summer land where the sun doth shine,
Where the weak grow strong and the strong grow great,
Here’s to "Down Home," the Old North State!

Here’s to the land of the cotton bloom white,
Where the scuppernong perfumes the breeze at night,
Where the soft southern moss and jessamine mate,
’Neath the murmuring pines of the Old North State!

Here’s to the land where the galax grows,
Where the rhododendron’s rosette glows,
Where soars Mount Mitchell’s summit great,
In the "Land of the Sky," in the Old North State!

Here’s to the land where maidens are fair,
Where friends are true and cold hearts rare,
The near land, the dear land, whatever fate,
The blest land, the best land, the Old North State!

"EcoSexual" -- it gives Tree Hugger a whole new meaning.

Old: "I broke up with that turkey."

New: "I broke up with that turkey-eater."

For Erik(#6) Thank you.

Charles Kuralt would be proud for your description of The Old North State

jessefan, that has to be the lamest post I’ve seen from you in a long time. The "horselaugh-worthy" excerpts that Steve posted show someone who just can’t tolerate being around a meat-eater (something tells me Steve and his "Men’s Retreat" pals are equally tolerant of vegetarians and vegans), and then you share your own examples of Dem elites patronizing stores that sell cheese and MEAT. You anecdotally claim that these haughty snobs are mostly Dems, and that they tend to drive expensive cars. It is a disgusting spectacle when THOSE people shop there, but somehow, presumably, it’s understandable when you and the other modest, humble Bush voters go there. I do wonder why you would patronize such a place if you are, apparently, proudly content with Velveeta and Bud, items that I would wager are not sold at such culinary boutiques.

I’ve always found it hard to swallow that recent GOP-driven concept of the brie-eating, latte-sipping, Volvo-driving liberal "elites." As if there aren’t PLENTY of Republicans who buy top-shelf edibles. I have seen some stats indicating that libs (and Dems) tend to drive Volvos more than their wealthy GOP counterparts, but nothing about cheese or coffees. I think most of such preferences can be much more easily discerned along wealth and income lines, not party loyalties. Plenty of uber-wealthy Republicans eat brie and drink latte, and I hate to break it to you jessefan, but I’m sure that many of them would look down on a meal involving Velveeta and/or Bud.

What’s funny is how you, dain, and others are seemingly indifferent to, or even approving of, the gourmand and oenophile musings offered offered here by Steve Hayward & co. You know, all that wine cellar talk and advice about the best steak to be had in this or that locale. Wouldn’t that all be horribly elitist if any of the same words came from a Dem or a liberal?

I know how much dain hates to see his own words come back to him, but allow me to refer you to this comment from dain, where he not only makes a Lord of the Rings reference, but rails against "wine-sipping, over-educated idiots." I guess for dain it’s okay to sip wine or be "over-educated" (??? obscurantism defined!) as long as you’re not an idiot - something which dain is the sole arbiter of, naturally.

I will also note that it’s odd that San Francisco magazine would publish something that so mercilessly mocks some of the stereotypical "San Francisco values" that were dangled as omens in voters’ faces a couple weeks back.

jesse fan,
That is my speculation, as well.

Craig Scanlon, I know Democrats who sneer at Republicans for the consumption of "elitist" comestibles. It is such a silly quarrel! My husband will not let me shop at Costco, because they support the Democratic Party. I miss it, as my tastes do not match our income. Shopping at Sam’s Club, when I no longer have a tribe of boys to feed, is not cost-effective anymore nor fun. I must buy my brie at Trader Joe’s, where it is, often, as cheap as Velveeta.

Yes, Kate it is such a silly quarrel, so please do not perpetuate it by saying things like "I know Democrats who sneer at Republicans for the consumption of ’elitist’ comestibles." Really? Well, I know Republicans who sneer at Democrats for the consumption of "elitist" comestibles. It is not pleasing to me to engage in this game.

Craig Scanlon, I am sorry, but that is just what I meant. To be absolutely tedious, I know Democrats and Republicans who sneer at the consumption of "elitist" comestibles by those of the other party and it is a silly quarrel because such things are about taste and have nothing, really, to do with politics. I KNEW you must, too, and did not see why you were making a fuss in comment #10.

I am attending a fund-raising wine auction this weekend with a a very dear friend, British-born, who is no Republican. He proudly claims to be socialist, and his politics are silly enough to support the contention. He usually votes for Democrats. He is a gourmand, knows far more about wine than I ever will bother to find out, will SPEND far more than we will,(because he can and we can’t) while pontificating on excessive consumption by "capitalist swine" like ourselves and others at the event. At some point, my gentle needling on the incongruity will get to him and he’ll sputter, spit or explode. His wife will take him aside and clean up the mess. After another glass of wine, he’ll be kissing me, telling me I am right, and laughing at himself.

I "perpetuate" this because, Craig, it was your game.

I’m a troll and I’m ugly. Blah blah blah.

I call these people eco-homo-islamo-communists, because they hate Jesus and America, and they like it when the Arabs blow stuff up. Especially American SUVs.

MY game, Kate? Please refer to comment #1 by jessefan to see where the game actually originated. Sorry if I didn’t catch your drift at first, but it was much less clear in #11 than it was in #14.

Oh-ho-ho-ho! So dain/jessefan (maybe Hal Holst?) has gone all clever and posted under my name. The "troll" name-calling is a dain trademark at this point (what, no "troll juice"??), and now I’ve been called ugly, too. Oh, the pain.

Oh my goodness! Ah nevah’d buhleaved that I wud git Mr. C. Scanlon soo bent outta shape.

My goodness I wuz usin’ a tad bit of satire. Folks at NC State and DUKE have referred to UNC supporters and alumni as wine sippers and cheese eaters. In return UNC people refer to NC State grads as coming from "Moo U." and both say Duke is nothing more than the University of New Jersey at Durham. I suppose many of their students come from there and who have rejected Rutgers U.

But let us get back to this "Kerry obsession" with the bumper stickers. It has been two years after the election and many people here are trapped in a timewarp. Let’s see what V. Hanson has to say........... ....sample.....Mr. Scanlon you may want to turn your head..

How could John Kerry, born into privilege, and then marrying and divorcing and marrying out of and back into greater inherited wealth, lecture anyone at a city college about the ingredients for success in America? If he were to give personal advice about making it, it would have to be to marry rich women. Nothing he has accomplished as a senator or candidate reveals either much natural intelligence or singular education. Today, Democrats must be wondering why they have embraced an overrated empty suit, and ostracized a real talent like Joe Lieberman.

And consider this........
Some of the brightest and most educated Americans are not only in the military, but veterans of Iraq. Two of the best educated minds I have met — Col. Bill Hix and Lt. Col. Chris Gibson, both Hoover Security Fellows — were both Iraqi veterans. What is striking about visiting Iraq is the wealth of talent there, from privates to generals. Without being gratuitously cruel, the problem of mediocrity is not in the ranks of the military, but on our university campuses, where half-educated professors and non-serious students killing time are ubiquitous. Personally, I’d wager the intelligence of a Marine Corps private any day over the average D.C. journalist. Every naval officer I met at the USNA, without exception, seemed brighter than John Kerry, whose "brilliance", after all, has managed to offend millions of voters on the eve of a pivotal election.

Nuff said.........!

jessefan, I don’t think I’ll ever fully understand your bizarre tangents when you shift into the drawl of a stereotypical good ol’ boy. Is there a point? Well, whatever floats your boat.

As for this, "How could John Kerry, born into privilege, and then marrying and divorcing and marrying out of and back into greater inherited wealth, lecture anyone at a city college about the ingredients for success in America? If he were to give personal advice about making it, it would have to be to marry rich women. Nothing he has accomplished as a senator or candidate reveals either much natural intelligence or singular education."

I couldn’t agree more. But I would remind you that Dubya was promoted as the natural choice for the salt-of-the-earth, non/anti-elite voter. How did that make even the slightest sense???

Suggested Mottoes for San Francisco:

"Free Love, Tree Love, and for the Stump-Fetish Community, Knee Love!"

"Not Only Do We Teach the Children to Put Condoms on Bananas, We Insist They be Organic, Fair-Trade Bananas!"

"A Dangerous and Radical Group of Extremists Trying to Propagandize School-kids and Destroy Our Rights: GLSN? No--Jr. ROTC!"

"Our Planned Parenthood Camps Meet the Highest Waste-Disposal Standards And Pay A Living Wage!"

"Even Our, Homeless...I mean, Habitat-Challenged Community have signs that say "Will Work For Free-Range, Hormone-Free Food". They’re Lying, Of Course."

"It’s Not the Compost--It’s the Control Issues, Stupid!"

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